Duawne Speaks On How He Knew
Wedding Anniversary Date: October 7, 2001
“I met my wife at age 19. I had just transferred from a small college in Maryland, to an even smaller college in Alabama. What I noticed first about her were her eyes. Not so much the color, though they are beautiful, but more so their intensity. When I looked into her eyes, I could see my future. Funny thing is, I don’t remember becoming friends with her. I just remember being friends with her. Ours was a great friendship because neither of us was available. I was dating someone else back home and so was she. This allowed us to get to know each other on an intimate level without physical intimacy, which was the foundation for what we share today.
I remember feeling comfortable with her from the very beginning. Being with her was not just fun, but easy. Neither of us had to fight for the other’s attention. It was generously given. I did not know then that I would marry her because I would not allow my mind to think of her as anything but a friend. Remember, I had a girlfriend at home who I loved and respected. But I grew to love my wife on a completely different level than my girlfriend. I just loved sharing the same space with her. I loved knowing that this really pretty girl was so incredibly cool at the same time. I loved that I could talk to her about whatever, and I really loved looking out for her. I even told her once that my children would call her 'Auntie' because I knew we would always be in each others lives. But I’m glad that they call her 'Mommy' instead.
10 years would pass between our meeting and our marriage. Long story short, she knew I was hers before I knew she was mine. Most women do. But when I knew...I really knew. Having fostered a solid friendship, I was afraid of exploring a relationship with her. I didn’t want to risk ruining what we had. But when she began dating a guy she had known all of her life, a casual friend of mine, I then realized that the possibility of us ever dating may never be. That made me uneasy.
At a wedding of a mutual friend we reconnected. She was a bridesmaid and I was the singer. As she came down the aisle, I was in awe of her. Though we had kept in touch we had not seen each other for a few years. She was now a woman – a very beautiful woman. She was the first bridesmaid to enter and I was singing, 'I want to spend tomorrow here with you', as she walked in. That day God gave me a foreshadow of what was to come. I saw her dressed in white coming to vow herself to me. For the rest of the day, I could not be away from her and when it was time to leave I did not want to. I always missed her when either of us left but this time I felt like pieces of me stayed with her. That day she took my heart home with her and didn’t even know it. I was afraid to tell her.
Nearly two years passed before I asked God who my wife was. I wanted to be with His choice for me. I had been dating and up to this point, all of my choices had proven to be inadequate. Unknowingly, I had been comparing every relationship to the woman my soul loves.
When I asked God, He answered me immediately. He said, 'Carmen'. It was as if He had been waiting for me to ask. 'How did I know it was God?' you may ask? It’s just like when my mom calls me on the phone. I don’t have to check the caller ID to figure out who I’m talking to. Because I’m in relationship with her I know her voice. And even if we were in a noisy, crowded room, I would still recognize her voice above all others because I’ve spent years with her. Her voice is familiar to me.
The same is true of God. When you spend time with Him you get to know Him and how He speaks as it relates to you. Not only did God speak it, but He also confirmed it through the mouths of three others. It was made more than clear that Carmen was His choice for me. And when I reflect on the decade of friendship we shared prior to our covenant day, she had always been my choice for me as well.”
Showing posts with label So How Did You Know?. Show all posts
Showing posts with label So How Did You Know?. Show all posts
So How Did You Know~Dwayna
Dwayna Speaks On How She Knew
Wedding Anniversary Date: September 1, 2007
How she knew her husband was the one for her:
“I knew Bryan was my husband because he was the exact opposite of the knucklehead (note: that is not the word I wanted to use) I previously dated. I was in the midst of a five-year relationship with my first 'love and lover' and I was feeling trapped. I loved him, but he was completely toxic to me. We'd been through so many relationship traumas that there really was no future for us, but I was afraid to let go. I was afraid that he'd leave me and actually do right by the next woman. The thought of that paralyzed me and kept me up at night. He would pick fights with me just so that he could sleep with other people. The worst part ... everyone knew, which made me the dumb chic who dates 'What's his name who slept with fill in the blank'.
Anyway, Bryan and I worked at the same place and he just carried himself with such pride, dignity and ease. You could tell just by looking at him. You know what they say, "Sugar tastes so much better once you've eaten s**t!" (Sorry ... there's no other word for that one :-) I watched him for weeks. He was on my mind day and night. AND everyone I asked about him had such wonderful things to say. I finally got the courage (even though I was still in my other relationship) to ask him out on a date. He said 'yes' and it’s been ... well … magic since that day.
This man feeds my soul. He was immediately interested in getting to know my mind … not my body. He did sweet things ... romantic things ... things you read in books. He cherished me. He nursed my soul back to health. He breathed life into what was dead and he loved what I thought was unlovable about me.
We've been married for just about 16 months now. It’s the wisest decision I've ever made in my life. I chose a partner who sees me. A partner who pushes me to be great. A man who understands that pleasing my body means starting with my mind. He is the definition ...
I sometimes wonder how I found him. I now know he actually was sent to me from God. I prayed for him and God answered. I used to hate that old church call to 'Wait for your husband' or 'God is gonna send you a man'. It used to make me so mad! (LOL) But ... when I was broken and naked in my shower one night I prayed strength to leave my toxic relationship and courage to seek/date a man just like Bryan . Two weeks later he appeared. He was always there before, but for some reason, I could finally see him.
We have a beautiful marriage and I thank God for my life everyday. It feels storybook at times, but I'm wise enough to know that it's just God's divine favor and sweet grace .”
Wedding Anniversary Date: September 1, 2007
How she knew her husband was the one for her:
“I knew Bryan was my husband because he was the exact opposite of the knucklehead (note: that is not the word I wanted to use) I previously dated. I was in the midst of a five-year relationship with my first 'love and lover' and I was feeling trapped. I loved him, but he was completely toxic to me. We'd been through so many relationship traumas that there really was no future for us, but I was afraid to let go. I was afraid that he'd leave me and actually do right by the next woman. The thought of that paralyzed me and kept me up at night. He would pick fights with me just so that he could sleep with other people. The worst part ... everyone knew, which made me the dumb chic who dates 'What's his name who slept with fill in the blank'.
Anyway, Bryan and I worked at the same place and he just carried himself with such pride, dignity and ease. You could tell just by looking at him. You know what they say, "Sugar tastes so much better once you've eaten s**t!" (Sorry ... there's no other word for that one :-) I watched him for weeks. He was on my mind day and night. AND everyone I asked about him had such wonderful things to say. I finally got the courage (even though I was still in my other relationship) to ask him out on a date. He said 'yes' and it’s been ... well … magic since that day.
This man feeds my soul. He was immediately interested in getting to know my mind … not my body. He did sweet things ... romantic things ... things you read in books. He cherished me. He nursed my soul back to health. He breathed life into what was dead and he loved what I thought was unlovable about me.
We've been married for just about 16 months now. It’s the wisest decision I've ever made in my life. I chose a partner who sees me. A partner who pushes me to be great. A man who understands that pleasing my body means starting with my mind. He is the definition ...
I sometimes wonder how I found him. I now know he actually was sent to me from God. I prayed for him and God answered. I used to hate that old church call to 'Wait for your husband' or 'God is gonna send you a man'. It used to make me so mad! (LOL) But ... when I was broken and naked in my shower one night I prayed strength to leave my toxic relationship and courage to seek/date a man just like Bryan . Two weeks later he appeared. He was always there before, but for some reason, I could finally see him.
We have a beautiful marriage and I thank God for my life everyday. It feels storybook at times, but I'm wise enough to know that it's just God's divine favor and sweet grace .”
So How Did You Know~Chelsea
Chelsea Speaks On How She Knew
Wedding Anniversary Date: September 7, 2001
How she knew her husband was the one for her:
“I met my husband through his Aunt Rhonda. I began working with Rhonda in September of 1999, only two months after I took a pledge of celibacy and TOTALLY rededicated my life to Yahweh. After only three weeks of working together, she inquired of my 'status'. I told her that I was single and was not looking. She told me that she liked my spirit and thought I would be a good match for her nephew who resided in Massachusetts. We continued to talk and before the long, the conversation switched to a different topic, and that was the last that I had heard of her nephew.
In June of 2000, Rhonda informed me that she had had a telephone conversation with her nephew the night before and had mentioned me to him. She stated that she intended to give him my phone number, but had forgotten my phone number at work. She entreated me to call him. I totally refused at first...only to find his name, email address and phone number being shoved in my hand, and me being shoved into my office with a plea of a promise that I would call or email him that same day. After vacillating about if calling him would be appropriate and the right thing to do, I acquiesced to her wishes, and promised that I would send an email that day.
I prayed before typing and sending the email. My prayer was simple. 'Give me the right words to say, and if this is not YOUR will, don’t allow him to respond.' I received a response in less than one hour. The response was both funny and captivating.
Daniel began emailing me daily, and I continued to pray BEFORE RESPONDING to his emails. My prayer was simple: 'Give me the right words to say.' Daniel eventually requested that we meet online to begin our 'Instant Messaging' (IM) relationship. I was so impressed by the simple-yet-IMPORTANT factor that he would establish the meeting time, and always met me ON TIME. He was NEVER LATE. In fact, he was often WAITING FOR ME.
After two weeks of emailing and IM each other, Daniel asked if he could have my phone number so that he may call and hear my voice. (Yes, ladies…it took me two weeks to give up the digits.) You see, along with my vow of celibacy, I also vowed to move at a snail’s pace with whomever I became interested in. I’ll have to share my 'From Singlehood to Marriedhood' testimony at a different time.
The first telephone conversation was nerve-racking for me because it was then that I decided to reveal my vow of celibacy to Daniel. I decided to reveal this during our first telephone conversation because the phone call itself was personal in that we were hearing one another’s voice for the first time, which had a certain feeling of intimacy that IM and emailing did not have. Additionally, I decided to reveal my celibacy as a second part of my prayer, which was also simple: 'If he will not respect my vow of celibacy, then let this be our last conversation.'
After disclosing my vow of celibacy to Daniel, he simply stated, 'Well, I’ll have to think about that.'
The conversation continued and two hours later, we were saying goodbye. Although I was unsure if I would ever hear from Daniel again, I was sure that I had done the right thing of disclosing my celibacy to him. Daniel emailed and called the next day. We continued emailing, IM'ing and talking on the phone for another four weeks before he even saw a single photograph of me. By this time, Daniel, in his own words, stated, 'I don’t care if you look like Sha-Nay-Nay, because you have a brotha sprung already. After all, Sha-Nay-Nay needs love, too.' Isn’t that the most hilarious thing you have heard!? We laughed for days about that, and sometimes still laugh about it! Ladies, it did not matter to Daniel what I looked like because he was truly getting to know ME first, as opposed to the exterior of me first.
To make the long of a story short, Daniel decided to propose to me in August of 2000 (Yeah, you did the math right). He proposed only two months after receiving my initial email. We decided to elope because most importantly, that is what I have always wanted to do, and secondly to minimize negative feedback from relatives, friends and associates. Daniel’s single request was that we have a formal wedding that would be officiated by a pastor. Our wedding date was September 7, 2001---the weekend of Labor Day. Daniel flew from Massachusetts to California on September 6th. Our INITIAL meeting in the airport was magical-yet-surreal. All we could do was smile, grin, hug and kiss one another. Others knew we were in love. Passersby would make nice comments about how good we looked together, how happy we looked and how much we beamed. We planned the perfect wedding. IT WAS A DAY THAT I SHALL NEVER FORGET AND NEVER WISH TO REPEAT WITH ANYONE ELSE.
I knew Daniel was my husband when he consistently displayed the following characteristics: Respect for my time, respect for my choices and respect for my relationship with Yahweh.”
Wedding Anniversary Date: September 7, 2001
How she knew her husband was the one for her:
“I met my husband through his Aunt Rhonda. I began working with Rhonda in September of 1999, only two months after I took a pledge of celibacy and TOTALLY rededicated my life to Yahweh. After only three weeks of working together, she inquired of my 'status'. I told her that I was single and was not looking. She told me that she liked my spirit and thought I would be a good match for her nephew who resided in Massachusetts. We continued to talk and before the long, the conversation switched to a different topic, and that was the last that I had heard of her nephew.
In June of 2000, Rhonda informed me that she had had a telephone conversation with her nephew the night before and had mentioned me to him. She stated that she intended to give him my phone number, but had forgotten my phone number at work. She entreated me to call him. I totally refused at first...only to find his name, email address and phone number being shoved in my hand, and me being shoved into my office with a plea of a promise that I would call or email him that same day. After vacillating about if calling him would be appropriate and the right thing to do, I acquiesced to her wishes, and promised that I would send an email that day.
I prayed before typing and sending the email. My prayer was simple. 'Give me the right words to say, and if this is not YOUR will, don’t allow him to respond.' I received a response in less than one hour. The response was both funny and captivating.
Daniel began emailing me daily, and I continued to pray BEFORE RESPONDING to his emails. My prayer was simple: 'Give me the right words to say.' Daniel eventually requested that we meet online to begin our 'Instant Messaging' (IM) relationship. I was so impressed by the simple-yet-IMPORTANT factor that he would establish the meeting time, and always met me ON TIME. He was NEVER LATE. In fact, he was often WAITING FOR ME.
After two weeks of emailing and IM each other, Daniel asked if he could have my phone number so that he may call and hear my voice. (Yes, ladies…it took me two weeks to give up the digits.) You see, along with my vow of celibacy, I also vowed to move at a snail’s pace with whomever I became interested in. I’ll have to share my 'From Singlehood to Marriedhood' testimony at a different time.
The first telephone conversation was nerve-racking for me because it was then that I decided to reveal my vow of celibacy to Daniel. I decided to reveal this during our first telephone conversation because the phone call itself was personal in that we were hearing one another’s voice for the first time, which had a certain feeling of intimacy that IM and emailing did not have. Additionally, I decided to reveal my celibacy as a second part of my prayer, which was also simple: 'If he will not respect my vow of celibacy, then let this be our last conversation.'
After disclosing my vow of celibacy to Daniel, he simply stated, 'Well, I’ll have to think about that.'
The conversation continued and two hours later, we were saying goodbye. Although I was unsure if I would ever hear from Daniel again, I was sure that I had done the right thing of disclosing my celibacy to him. Daniel emailed and called the next day. We continued emailing, IM'ing and talking on the phone for another four weeks before he even saw a single photograph of me. By this time, Daniel, in his own words, stated, 'I don’t care if you look like Sha-Nay-Nay, because you have a brotha sprung already. After all, Sha-Nay-Nay needs love, too.' Isn’t that the most hilarious thing you have heard!? We laughed for days about that, and sometimes still laugh about it! Ladies, it did not matter to Daniel what I looked like because he was truly getting to know ME first, as opposed to the exterior of me first.
To make the long of a story short, Daniel decided to propose to me in August of 2000 (Yeah, you did the math right). He proposed only two months after receiving my initial email. We decided to elope because most importantly, that is what I have always wanted to do, and secondly to minimize negative feedback from relatives, friends and associates. Daniel’s single request was that we have a formal wedding that would be officiated by a pastor. Our wedding date was September 7, 2001---the weekend of Labor Day. Daniel flew from Massachusetts to California on September 6th. Our INITIAL meeting in the airport was magical-yet-surreal. All we could do was smile, grin, hug and kiss one another. Others knew we were in love. Passersby would make nice comments about how good we looked together, how happy we looked and how much we beamed. We planned the perfect wedding. IT WAS A DAY THAT I SHALL NEVER FORGET AND NEVER WISH TO REPEAT WITH ANYONE ELSE.
I knew Daniel was my husband when he consistently displayed the following characteristics: Respect for my time, respect for my choices and respect for my relationship with Yahweh.”
So How Did You Know~Duwane
Duawne Speaks On How He Knew
Wedding Anniversary Date: October 7, 2001
How he knew his wife was the one for him:
“I met my wife at age 19. I had just transferred from a small college in Maryland, to an even smaller college in Alabama. What I noticed first about her were her eyes. Not so much the color, though they are beautiful, but more so their intensity. When I looked into her eyes, I could see my future. Funny thing is, I don’t remember becoming friends with her. I just remember being friends with her. Ours was a great friendship because neither of us was available. I was dating someone else back home and so was she. This allowed us to get to know each other on an intimate level without physical intimacy, which was the foundation for what we share today.
I remember feeling comfortable with her from the very beginning. Being with her was not just fun, but easy. Neither of us had to fight for the other’s attention. It was generously given. I did not know then that I would marry her because I would not allow my mind to think of her as anything but a friend. Remember, I had a girlfriend at home who I loved and respected. But I grew to love my wife on a completely different level than my girlfriend. I just loved sharing the same space with her. I loved knowing that this really pretty girl was so incredibly cool at the same time. I loved that I could talk to her about whatever, and I really loved looking out for her. I even told her once that my children would call her 'Auntie' because I knew we would always be in each others lives. But I’m glad that they call her 'Mommy' instead.
10 years would pass between our meeting and our marriage. Long story short, she knew I was hers before I knew she was mine. Most women do. But when I knew...I really knew. Having fostered a solid friendship, I was afraid of exploring a relationship with her. I didn’t want to risk ruining what we had. But when she began dating a guy she had known all of her life, a casual friend of mine, I then realized that the possibility of us ever dating may never be. That made me uneasy.
At a wedding of a mutual friend we reconnected. She was a bridesmaid and I was the singer. As she came down the aisle, I was in awe of her. Though we had kept in touch we had not seen each other for a few years. She was now a woman – a very beautiful woman. She was the first bridesmaid to enter and I was singing, 'I want to spend tomorrow here with you', as she walked in. That day God gave me a foreshadow of what was to come. I saw her dressed in white coming to vow herself to me. For the rest of the day, I could not be away from her and when it was time to leave I did not want to. I always missed her when either of us left but this time I felt like pieces of me stayed with her. That day she took my heart home with her and didn’t even know it. I was afraid to tell her.
Nearly two years passed before I asked God who my wife was. I wanted to be with His choice for me. I had been dating and up to this point, all of my choices had proven to be inadequate. Unknowingly, I had been comparing every relationship to the woman my soul loves.
When I asked God, He answered me immediately. He said, 'Carmen'. It was as if He had been waiting for me to ask. 'How did I know it was God?' you may ask? It’s just like when my mom calls me on the phone. I don’t have to check the caller ID to figure out who I’m talking to. Because I’m in relationship with her I know her voice. And even if we were in a noisy, crowded room, I would still recognize her voice above all others because I’ve spent years with her. Her voice is familiar to me.
The same is true of God. When you spend time with Him you get to know Him and how He speaks as it relates to you. Not only did God speak it, but He also confirmed it through the mouths of three others. It was made more than clear that Carmen was His choice for me. And when I reflect on the decade of friendship we shared prior to our covenant day, she had always been my choice for me as well.”
Wedding Anniversary Date: October 7, 2001
How he knew his wife was the one for him:
“I met my wife at age 19. I had just transferred from a small college in Maryland, to an even smaller college in Alabama. What I noticed first about her were her eyes. Not so much the color, though they are beautiful, but more so their intensity. When I looked into her eyes, I could see my future. Funny thing is, I don’t remember becoming friends with her. I just remember being friends with her. Ours was a great friendship because neither of us was available. I was dating someone else back home and so was she. This allowed us to get to know each other on an intimate level without physical intimacy, which was the foundation for what we share today.
I remember feeling comfortable with her from the very beginning. Being with her was not just fun, but easy. Neither of us had to fight for the other’s attention. It was generously given. I did not know then that I would marry her because I would not allow my mind to think of her as anything but a friend. Remember, I had a girlfriend at home who I loved and respected. But I grew to love my wife on a completely different level than my girlfriend. I just loved sharing the same space with her. I loved knowing that this really pretty girl was so incredibly cool at the same time. I loved that I could talk to her about whatever, and I really loved looking out for her. I even told her once that my children would call her 'Auntie' because I knew we would always be in each others lives. But I’m glad that they call her 'Mommy' instead.
10 years would pass between our meeting and our marriage. Long story short, she knew I was hers before I knew she was mine. Most women do. But when I knew...I really knew. Having fostered a solid friendship, I was afraid of exploring a relationship with her. I didn’t want to risk ruining what we had. But when she began dating a guy she had known all of her life, a casual friend of mine, I then realized that the possibility of us ever dating may never be. That made me uneasy.
At a wedding of a mutual friend we reconnected. She was a bridesmaid and I was the singer. As she came down the aisle, I was in awe of her. Though we had kept in touch we had not seen each other for a few years. She was now a woman – a very beautiful woman. She was the first bridesmaid to enter and I was singing, 'I want to spend tomorrow here with you', as she walked in. That day God gave me a foreshadow of what was to come. I saw her dressed in white coming to vow herself to me. For the rest of the day, I could not be away from her and when it was time to leave I did not want to. I always missed her when either of us left but this time I felt like pieces of me stayed with her. That day she took my heart home with her and didn’t even know it. I was afraid to tell her.
Nearly two years passed before I asked God who my wife was. I wanted to be with His choice for me. I had been dating and up to this point, all of my choices had proven to be inadequate. Unknowingly, I had been comparing every relationship to the woman my soul loves.
When I asked God, He answered me immediately. He said, 'Carmen'. It was as if He had been waiting for me to ask. 'How did I know it was God?' you may ask? It’s just like when my mom calls me on the phone. I don’t have to check the caller ID to figure out who I’m talking to. Because I’m in relationship with her I know her voice. And even if we were in a noisy, crowded room, I would still recognize her voice above all others because I’ve spent years with her. Her voice is familiar to me.
The same is true of God. When you spend time with Him you get to know Him and how He speaks as it relates to you. Not only did God speak it, but He also confirmed it through the mouths of three others. It was made more than clear that Carmen was His choice for me. And when I reflect on the decade of friendship we shared prior to our covenant day, she had always been my choice for me as well.”
So How Did You Know?~ Tiff
Today is a special "So How Did You Know"...we have a husband and wife post! :) Tiff is actually married to J....its really interesting to see both points of view...ENJOY
Tiff Speaks On How She Knew
Wedding Anniversary Date: October 14, 2006
How she knew her husband was the one for her:
“Honestly, no one thing determined that he was 'The One'. I’d say, for us it was more like a puzzle---and eventually all the pieces just fit. It’s been about nine years now since the first time I encountered my husband. Little did I know that a series of events over the following six years would lead us to our wedding day.
We were both just freshmen in college when we met, him an 'Army brat' whose family called New Orleans home, and me who grew up on a farm in the country. We both had so much to discover about ourselves and each other. There was an immediate indescribable connection between us….more than physical chemistry; it was as if we had been friends for years. I would say our freshmen year was a year of just pure delight in each other! One thing that I believe was instrumental in our bond was the fact that we found a wonderful church. It helped to ensure that we were surrounded by good people and receiving spiritual enrichment.
There were many turning points and new levels in our relationship. We experienced the ups and downs of college life together. We had a few break-ups and make-ups. We had been together for about four years when I finally told him about some serious personal baggage I was dealing with. Around that same time, I learned of deeper personal issues that he dealt with. When he knew about the deep inner issues that I struggled with and he didn’t vanish into thin air, I thought, 'Wow, there is something quite unique about him'.
Over the duration of our relationship, we’d been swept up in moments of idealistic, 'movie-like' romance...we’d been given prophetic words about our future marriage...and we’d seen the subtle hints that this was predestined by God. I recall that J even had a dream two weeks into our relationship that we would get married. However, nothing more earnestly illustrated to me that he was 'The One' than when I revealed a not-so-pretty, messed up, far-from-perfect girl and he still saw the God in me. We reached a place of complete transparency which made us totally vulnerable to each other. It took lots of time to build trust, commitment, integrity, maturity and loyalty. Seeing those attributes showed me we could do life together.”
Tiff Speaks On How She Knew
Wedding Anniversary Date: October 14, 2006
How she knew her husband was the one for her:
“Honestly, no one thing determined that he was 'The One'. I’d say, for us it was more like a puzzle---and eventually all the pieces just fit. It’s been about nine years now since the first time I encountered my husband. Little did I know that a series of events over the following six years would lead us to our wedding day.
We were both just freshmen in college when we met, him an 'Army brat' whose family called New Orleans home, and me who grew up on a farm in the country. We both had so much to discover about ourselves and each other. There was an immediate indescribable connection between us….more than physical chemistry; it was as if we had been friends for years. I would say our freshmen year was a year of just pure delight in each other! One thing that I believe was instrumental in our bond was the fact that we found a wonderful church. It helped to ensure that we were surrounded by good people and receiving spiritual enrichment.
There were many turning points and new levels in our relationship. We experienced the ups and downs of college life together. We had a few break-ups and make-ups. We had been together for about four years when I finally told him about some serious personal baggage I was dealing with. Around that same time, I learned of deeper personal issues that he dealt with. When he knew about the deep inner issues that I struggled with and he didn’t vanish into thin air, I thought, 'Wow, there is something quite unique about him'.
Over the duration of our relationship, we’d been swept up in moments of idealistic, 'movie-like' romance...we’d been given prophetic words about our future marriage...and we’d seen the subtle hints that this was predestined by God. I recall that J even had a dream two weeks into our relationship that we would get married. However, nothing more earnestly illustrated to me that he was 'The One' than when I revealed a not-so-pretty, messed up, far-from-perfect girl and he still saw the God in me. We reached a place of complete transparency which made us totally vulnerable to each other. It took lots of time to build trust, commitment, integrity, maturity and loyalty. Seeing those attributes showed me we could do life together.”
Sow How Did You Know~J
J Speaks On How He Knew
Wedding Anniversary Date: October 14, 2006
How he knew his wife was the one for him:
“There was not one single thing that led me to know that Tiffany would become my wife. It was really a combination of things. It was part romanticism...part spirituality...part 'time put in'... and part real life/adult decision making.
I met Tiff at MTSU in 2000 and I immediately noticed that she was different. It seemed that her level of class and maturity was higher than most college girls that I encountered. Yet, she was still down to earth and had great sense of humor. She was the 'girl you take home to momma', so my intentions were somewhat serious from the jump. I even called my mom and told her that I found my wife. I’d be lying if I said that this was some revelation from God, or some deep mysterious feeling in my gut. I was simply reacting to the potential. Dating a woman like Tiffany was a rare opportunity that a lot of fellas don’t get in college, so I hoped to make the best of it. I will say, however, that about two or three weeks into our dating, I had a dream of our wedding---but it didn’t seem like a 'vision from the Lord'. I thought that it was amusing, but I didn’t put too much stake into it.
Around the same time that Tiffany and I started dating, I began to really take my spiritual life seriously. We started attending church together and began to make God a part of our regular conversation. In April of 2001 ,I made the decision to be baptized, and she and I discussed it after church. She began to tell me how it was so important to her that I grow in God and that she wanted to make sure she did her part to help me. At that moment it became more than 'dating the chick you marry' girl on the yard. That conversation changed my view of her and us completely. It revealed a different kind of love; a love that was far superior to what I’d hear in songs or see in movies. It was really something special. That was definitely a clue that she could be the one. We casually spoke about getting married one day, but honestly, we were 19-years-old and far too immature to be serious. So we continued to date throughout college.
As we continued to date, problems arose. We had some break-ups and make-ups, like most serious relationships. We probably broke up and got back together about three times over the course of six years. The last break up, however, was different. I thought it was officially the end. I took down pictures, and put away love letters, but I was still hoping to mend what we had.
Now most guys, single and free, would have probably used this as an opportunity to 'play the field' again, but it was different for me. Tiffany left an impression on me. Being with her made me want to continue to grow. I realized that I found a woman who inspired me to be a better man than I was. That was it! I knew that if we got back together it would be forever. We did, and it ended being for the long hall.
Now, before you say 'Awwwh, what a fairytale ending', let me stop you. It still took A WHOLE LOT of praying, discussion, and some serious thought before we made THE decision. Marriage is not a game. It is not a decision to be taken lightly. We said that if we were going to do it, we were going to do it FOR REAL!! It was going to be FOREVER, no matter what! So with all of the personal revelations, prophetic words, epiphanies, romantic moments, and mushy stuff, it still came down to a decision to honor our vows TIL DEATH!”
Wedding Anniversary Date: October 14, 2006
How he knew his wife was the one for him:
“There was not one single thing that led me to know that Tiffany would become my wife. It was really a combination of things. It was part romanticism...part spirituality...part 'time put in'... and part real life/adult decision making.
I met Tiff at MTSU in 2000 and I immediately noticed that she was different. It seemed that her level of class and maturity was higher than most college girls that I encountered. Yet, she was still down to earth and had great sense of humor. She was the 'girl you take home to momma', so my intentions were somewhat serious from the jump. I even called my mom and told her that I found my wife. I’d be lying if I said that this was some revelation from God, or some deep mysterious feeling in my gut. I was simply reacting to the potential. Dating a woman like Tiffany was a rare opportunity that a lot of fellas don’t get in college, so I hoped to make the best of it. I will say, however, that about two or three weeks into our dating, I had a dream of our wedding---but it didn’t seem like a 'vision from the Lord'. I thought that it was amusing, but I didn’t put too much stake into it.
Around the same time that Tiffany and I started dating, I began to really take my spiritual life seriously. We started attending church together and began to make God a part of our regular conversation. In April of 2001 ,I made the decision to be baptized, and she and I discussed it after church. She began to tell me how it was so important to her that I grow in God and that she wanted to make sure she did her part to help me. At that moment it became more than 'dating the chick you marry' girl on the yard. That conversation changed my view of her and us completely. It revealed a different kind of love; a love that was far superior to what I’d hear in songs or see in movies. It was really something special. That was definitely a clue that she could be the one. We casually spoke about getting married one day, but honestly, we were 19-years-old and far too immature to be serious. So we continued to date throughout college.
As we continued to date, problems arose. We had some break-ups and make-ups, like most serious relationships. We probably broke up and got back together about three times over the course of six years. The last break up, however, was different. I thought it was officially the end. I took down pictures, and put away love letters, but I was still hoping to mend what we had.
Now most guys, single and free, would have probably used this as an opportunity to 'play the field' again, but it was different for me. Tiffany left an impression on me. Being with her made me want to continue to grow. I realized that I found a woman who inspired me to be a better man than I was. That was it! I knew that if we got back together it would be forever. We did, and it ended being for the long hall.
Now, before you say 'Awwwh, what a fairytale ending', let me stop you. It still took A WHOLE LOT of praying, discussion, and some serious thought before we made THE decision. Marriage is not a game. It is not a decision to be taken lightly. We said that if we were going to do it, we were going to do it FOR REAL!! It was going to be FOREVER, no matter what! So with all of the personal revelations, prophetic words, epiphanies, romantic moments, and mushy stuff, it still came down to a decision to honor our vows TIL DEATH!”
So How Did You Know~Noelle
Noelle Speaks On How She Knew
Wedding Anniversary Date: October 18, 2008
How she knew her husband was the one for her:
“I knew I was going to marry Marcel before I met him. I read a blog about someone who never wanted to get married.
I, on the other hand, was quite anxious to get married. In fact, I did so when everyone recommended that I didn’t. Several years later, the marriage ended and after some more years of struggling with romantic relationships, I told God that I wasn’t going to date again until I understood in my soul that He was enough. I had spent a lifetime trying to convince myself of that fact, but continued to look for a romantic relationship...and ended up continuously frustrated. I decided to stop fighting and get quiet.
It would be hard to overstate how difficult this was. I felt a pain almost like a physical withdrawal. Long story short, I stuck with it and it took about a year and a half. During that time, I spoke with men from my family and co-workers and that was it. (I should add to this story that there was a lot of therapy, support groups, prayer, and accountability in this mix. I was not able to do this on my own.) At some point during that year, my mom asked about the possibility of me dating someone of our faith. My first husband had been a pastor in our faith and I think I told mom not to hold her breath or something equally rude. Out of some guilt, I agreed that when I was dating again, I would look at one of the singles' websites for people in our faith.
I’m still not sure when or exactly how it happened, but one morning I woke up and found myself at peace with the idea of being alone---even if that was for the rest of my life. I went out on a few dates and found myself thinking at times, 'I could be home cleaning my house.' Not because the guys weren’t nice, but I didn’t need it anymore.
I made another equally drastic decision. I decided I wasn’t going to date again until I found the man I would marry. My life was full and rich and I didn’t want to spend even a few hours on something that wasn’t a part of God’s plan for me. I had enough 'practice dating'. I decided that God would pick and until He notified me, I wasn’t interested.
A few months later, to fulfill my promise to my mother, I posted a profile on a website. I didn’t pay for a subscription and never checked the emails. But my conscience was clear. At one point I got an email with the name of my favorite band when I was a preteen. Of course, I had to check the email in case it was my adolescent crush who had come to sweep me off my feet.
It wasn’t Kevin, but it was Marcel.
He had listed his blog address and out of curiosity I checked it. (www.thecarioca.blogspot.com) I was quite impressed and after reading one of his posts (about a homeless man who had cut him off and his reaction to that), I was impressed by this man of passion who could also admit his mistakes. After reading a few more posts, I looked down at Izzy, my trusty canine sidekick and told her, 'This could be the guy.'
Marcel and I began to communicate by email a few times a week, and after a little time, we figured out that he lived five miles from my brother and aunt in Los Angeles. Marcel offered to pay for half the ticket the next time I visited my brother...and the rest as they say...is history.
We have been married now for a little over four months. I am consistently amazed by the difference in marriage from when I picked before and when I let God pick the man and the timing now. It was worth the wait and every moment of heartache. The joy is as much about knowing that God is my all as it is about this wonderful man I’ve pledged my life to. From this place I don’t operate from fear, wondering when the other shoe is going to drop. I am free--- body and soul---to love this man God gave me.”
Wedding Anniversary Date: October 18, 2008
How she knew her husband was the one for her:
“I knew I was going to marry Marcel before I met him. I read a blog about someone who never wanted to get married.
I, on the other hand, was quite anxious to get married. In fact, I did so when everyone recommended that I didn’t. Several years later, the marriage ended and after some more years of struggling with romantic relationships, I told God that I wasn’t going to date again until I understood in my soul that He was enough. I had spent a lifetime trying to convince myself of that fact, but continued to look for a romantic relationship...and ended up continuously frustrated. I decided to stop fighting and get quiet.
It would be hard to overstate how difficult this was. I felt a pain almost like a physical withdrawal. Long story short, I stuck with it and it took about a year and a half. During that time, I spoke with men from my family and co-workers and that was it. (I should add to this story that there was a lot of therapy, support groups, prayer, and accountability in this mix. I was not able to do this on my own.) At some point during that year, my mom asked about the possibility of me dating someone of our faith. My first husband had been a pastor in our faith and I think I told mom not to hold her breath or something equally rude. Out of some guilt, I agreed that when I was dating again, I would look at one of the singles' websites for people in our faith.
I’m still not sure when or exactly how it happened, but one morning I woke up and found myself at peace with the idea of being alone---even if that was for the rest of my life. I went out on a few dates and found myself thinking at times, 'I could be home cleaning my house.' Not because the guys weren’t nice, but I didn’t need it anymore.
I made another equally drastic decision. I decided I wasn’t going to date again until I found the man I would marry. My life was full and rich and I didn’t want to spend even a few hours on something that wasn’t a part of God’s plan for me. I had enough 'practice dating'. I decided that God would pick and until He notified me, I wasn’t interested.
A few months later, to fulfill my promise to my mother, I posted a profile on a website. I didn’t pay for a subscription and never checked the emails. But my conscience was clear. At one point I got an email with the name of my favorite band when I was a preteen. Of course, I had to check the email in case it was my adolescent crush who had come to sweep me off my feet.
It wasn’t Kevin, but it was Marcel.
He had listed his blog address and out of curiosity I checked it. (www.thecarioca.blogspot.com) I was quite impressed and after reading one of his posts (about a homeless man who had cut him off and his reaction to that), I was impressed by this man of passion who could also admit his mistakes. After reading a few more posts, I looked down at Izzy, my trusty canine sidekick and told her, 'This could be the guy.'
Marcel and I began to communicate by email a few times a week, and after a little time, we figured out that he lived five miles from my brother and aunt in Los Angeles. Marcel offered to pay for half the ticket the next time I visited my brother...and the rest as they say...is history.
We have been married now for a little over four months. I am consistently amazed by the difference in marriage from when I picked before and when I let God pick the man and the timing now. It was worth the wait and every moment of heartache. The joy is as much about knowing that God is my all as it is about this wonderful man I’ve pledged my life to. From this place I don’t operate from fear, wondering when the other shoe is going to drop. I am free--- body and soul---to love this man God gave me.”
So How Did You Know~Tiff
Tiff Speaks On How She Knew
Wedding Anniversary Date: October 14, 2006
How she knew her husband was the one for her:
“Honestly, no one thing determined that he was 'The One'. I’d say, for us it was more like a puzzle---and eventually all the pieces just fit. It’s been about nine years now since the first time I encountered my husband. Little did I know that a series of events over the following six years would lead us to our wedding day.
We were both just freshmen in college when we met, him an 'Army brat' whose family called New Orleans home, and me who grew up on a farm in the country. We both had so much to discover about ourselves and each other. There was an immediate indescribable connection between us….more than physical chemistry; it was as if we had been friends for years. I would say our freshmen year was a year of just pure delight in each other! One thing that I believe was instrumental in our bond was the fact that we found a wonderful church. It helped to ensure that we were surrounded by good people and receiving spiritual enrichment.
There were many turning points and new levels in our relationship. We experienced the ups and downs of college life together. We had a few break-ups and make-ups. We had been together for about four years when I finally told him about some serious personal baggage I was dealing with. Around that same time, I learned of deeper personal issues that he dealt with. When he knew about the deep inner issues that I struggled with and he didn’t vanish into thin air, I thought, 'Wow, there is something quite unique about him'.
Over the duration of our relationship, we’d been swept up in moments of idealistic, 'movie-like' romance...we’d been given prophetic words about our future marriage...and we’d seen the subtle hints that this was predestined by God. I recall that J even had a dream two weeks into our relationship that we would get married. However, nothing more earnestly illustrated to me that he was 'The One' than when I revealed a not-so-pretty, messed up, far-from-perfect girl and he still saw the God in me. We reached a place of complete transparency which made us totally vulnerable to each other. It took lots of time to build trust, commitment, integrity, maturity and loyalty. Seeing those attributes showed me we could do life together.”
Wedding Anniversary Date: October 14, 2006
How she knew her husband was the one for her:
“Honestly, no one thing determined that he was 'The One'. I’d say, for us it was more like a puzzle---and eventually all the pieces just fit. It’s been about nine years now since the first time I encountered my husband. Little did I know that a series of events over the following six years would lead us to our wedding day.
We were both just freshmen in college when we met, him an 'Army brat' whose family called New Orleans home, and me who grew up on a farm in the country. We both had so much to discover about ourselves and each other. There was an immediate indescribable connection between us….more than physical chemistry; it was as if we had been friends for years. I would say our freshmen year was a year of just pure delight in each other! One thing that I believe was instrumental in our bond was the fact that we found a wonderful church. It helped to ensure that we were surrounded by good people and receiving spiritual enrichment.
There were many turning points and new levels in our relationship. We experienced the ups and downs of college life together. We had a few break-ups and make-ups. We had been together for about four years when I finally told him about some serious personal baggage I was dealing with. Around that same time, I learned of deeper personal issues that he dealt with. When he knew about the deep inner issues that I struggled with and he didn’t vanish into thin air, I thought, 'Wow, there is something quite unique about him'.
Over the duration of our relationship, we’d been swept up in moments of idealistic, 'movie-like' romance...we’d been given prophetic words about our future marriage...and we’d seen the subtle hints that this was predestined by God. I recall that J even had a dream two weeks into our relationship that we would get married. However, nothing more earnestly illustrated to me that he was 'The One' than when I revealed a not-so-pretty, messed up, far-from-perfect girl and he still saw the God in me. We reached a place of complete transparency which made us totally vulnerable to each other. It took lots of time to build trust, commitment, integrity, maturity and loyalty. Seeing those attributes showed me we could do life together.”
So How Did You Know-Quincy
Wedding Anniversary Date: March 18, 2000
How he knew his wife was the one for him:
“My wife and I had known each other for three years. We had mutual friends, had classes together, even did our student teaching at the same school. Our paths crossed off and on during that period. We both had significant others during this time, and never looked at each other as anything but friends.
When I broke up with my girlfriend at the time, a mutual friend told her that I was going through a rough time. She called to cheer me up and we ended up hanging out that night for hours representing, as it turned out, our first of many dates. She indicated early on that I was the one for her and I immediately responded that I was not and that I had many issues. For the first time, I was honest with someone I was dating about my flaws.
On New Year's Eve 1998, I was sitting in her apartment while she and her brother were at church and I began to reflect on the year and the prospects for the new year. In all areas of my life, I surmised that I was almost where I needed to be, but there was something keeping me from reaching it...an unexplainable void which was a stumbling block to fulfilling God's purpose for me. It was right there I knew it. I needed a helpmeet, and not just any helpmeet but her specifically. It was right then I knew I wanted to spend the rest of life with this woman and unite with her as we presented this union and eventually this family to God for His glory not ours.
This was revealed with a degree of clarity I never thought possible when it comes to relationships. She is strong in the areas I am weak, she did not match me up with a checklist of requirements she had for a man, but looked at the whole me as opposed to some stat sheet. We both wanted nothing from each other, but wanted an opportunity to give to each other.
Our souls established a connection which can never be broken which enables us to weather the storms we have and our personal moments of weakness. And that's how I knew and still know she is the one.”
How he knew his wife was the one for him:
“My wife and I had known each other for three years. We had mutual friends, had classes together, even did our student teaching at the same school. Our paths crossed off and on during that period. We both had significant others during this time, and never looked at each other as anything but friends.
When I broke up with my girlfriend at the time, a mutual friend told her that I was going through a rough time. She called to cheer me up and we ended up hanging out that night for hours representing, as it turned out, our first of many dates. She indicated early on that I was the one for her and I immediately responded that I was not and that I had many issues. For the first time, I was honest with someone I was dating about my flaws.
On New Year's Eve 1998, I was sitting in her apartment while she and her brother were at church and I began to reflect on the year and the prospects for the new year. In all areas of my life, I surmised that I was almost where I needed to be, but there was something keeping me from reaching it...an unexplainable void which was a stumbling block to fulfilling God's purpose for me. It was right there I knew it. I needed a helpmeet, and not just any helpmeet but her specifically. It was right then I knew I wanted to spend the rest of life with this woman and unite with her as we presented this union and eventually this family to God for His glory not ours.
This was revealed with a degree of clarity I never thought possible when it comes to relationships. She is strong in the areas I am weak, she did not match me up with a checklist of requirements she had for a man, but looked at the whole me as opposed to some stat sheet. We both wanted nothing from each other, but wanted an opportunity to give to each other.
Our souls established a connection which can never be broken which enables us to weather the storms we have and our personal moments of weakness. And that's how I knew and still know she is the one.”
So How Did You Know~Angie
Wedding Anniversary Date: July 14, 1984
How she knew her husband was the one for her:
"It's strange. I knew when I saw him across a very crowded dark room. Something about him made him stand out to me. I told my twin sister right then, 'You see that guy over there (and pointed him out)? I'm gonna marry him.' True story. So, in that, I feel like our marriage was somehow fated or preordained."
For more from Angie including advice for single women click here
How she knew her husband was the one for her:
"It's strange. I knew when I saw him across a very crowded dark room. Something about him made him stand out to me. I told my twin sister right then, 'You see that guy over there (and pointed him out)? I'm gonna marry him.' True story. So, in that, I feel like our marriage was somehow fated or preordained."
For more from Angie including advice for single women click here
So How Did You Know Sundays
If you're not familiar with this site the I suggest you get with it! Its a wonderful site that asks (and answers) married couples the age old question "how did you know you mate was the one?". I'll try to post a story every Sunday, but if you want you can check it out here< <="" a="">
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